Child psychologist Dr. Kennedy argues that while 'good job' isn't inherently harmful, parents should follow it with specific praise to build their child's confidence and prevent reliance on external validation. She recommends asking follow-up questions and highlighting positive behaviors to foster a child's sense of self-efficacy and help them develop the ability to validate themselves.
Your child gets a good grade on a test. "Good job!" you respond. The scenario seems pretty straightforward — but those two words can backfire on you, says child psychologistIf you don't add a more specific form of praise onto the end, "good job" can be a "conversation ender," Kennedy said on a
"In those moments, we want as parents to double down on building our kid's confidence. That's usually the goal we're optimizing for," said Kennedy, A parent of three children herself, Kennedy admitted that the advice "sounds annoying at first ... anything that helps your kid share more about themself actually ends up feeling better to your kid."Specific praise helps kids develop inner efficacy
Like Kennedy, Pressman agreed that parents don't need to eliminate the phrase "good job" from their vocabularies completely — but it should always be followed by specific praise.
PARENTING CHILD DEVELOPMENT CONFIDENCE PRAISE VALIDATION
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