The writer did not realize cryptic social media posts were about the death of her husband.
A friend that I rarely see, other than on social media, posted a confusing message. As she seemed to be in great distress, I clicked on the “care” button and figured I would find out in time what was going on. The messages continued for a week.Since she seemed to be so distraught, I thought it was more polite to simply continue to click on the “care” button for all of these posts rather than ask her to explain what had happened. It turns out that her husband had died suddenly.
Do I send her a letter of condolence on her loss, with perhaps an offer to meet her for coffee at some time in the future? Or, in my confusion, have I exceeded the statute of limitations for giving condolences? I do not want to make her life worse right now.you pushed the “care” button too many times? Whether this is literally the case or not, metaphorically it is not possible. Miss Manners assures you a written condolence letter will not make life worse for this person.
I feel like the urge to add some kind of introduction comes from writing longer emails. Is it rude to just ask a question over text without some kind of preface? Or is that okay when people are expecting a shorter message?at its core, informal. But Miss Manners shares your affinity for prefacing the subject with “quick question” or a short greeting. That said, she detests the arresting “hey!” and finds it even more jarring than no greeting at all.
Unless this was the latter, or only the last in a series of inconsiderate behaviors from your friend, and you have simply had enough, Miss Manners suggests you try to make amends. And avoid crowded restaurants.At 96, they fell in love playing pool. She rejected his first marriage offer.
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