Dear Annie: My neighbor gives me gifts I don’t want. What do I do?

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Dear Annie: My neighbor gives me gifts I don’t want. What do I do?
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Advice from Annie Lane.

I always enjoy sharing my baked goods and also my soups with my neighbors. Some will return the favor by making items for me. I never expect them to reciprocate, though I know I always try to reciprocate when people do things for me.

I’m writing to you because now someone is giving me presents that I really don’t want. I am always thankful, but I do not like any of the items. I know I need to be thankful. But I do not like to lie, and I would rather have just a thanks for my baked goods and soups instead of thank-you gifts that I do not like at all!

Normally, I would just donate the items to a church, but I am too afraid that this friend will be looking for me to use the items. And, of course, I do not want to hurt her feelings. What is your suggestion?“The true purpose of a gift is to be received,” writes minimalist expert Marie Kondo in her bestsellingand I couldn’t agree more. When someone gives you an unwanted gift, receive it gratefully; recognize the warm-hearted intention behind it; and write them a thank-you note.

I learned long ago not to judge by appearance. Thank you for explaining that things aren’t always what they seem.I’m sorry that you’re struggling with rheumatoid arthritis. I’m happy to print your letter to again amplify the message that others’ suffering and limitations are not always readily apparent.Your advice to “Left Behind” would be poor advice in some states.

“Left Behind” should consult a lawyer with a family law practice in her state to find out if she has any rights.I’m embarrassed to say that I failed to get the complete picture when researching my answer. I’m printing your note to correct the record for “Left Behind” and anyone else in her shoes. Contacting a lawyer is the best bet. Thanks for writing and setting me straight.Annie Lane offers common-sense solutions to everyday problems.

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