Advice from Annie Lane.
Updated: 1 minute agoDear Annie: I was the one who set off a whole flurry of responses because I wrote that I hated being old, hated the wrinkles and hated the condescension and obligatory solicitousness that people showed to old people just because they were old. I said I hated looking old because I think some people react to one’s aged appearance as others react to skin color or religion-required apparel. My point was that people should not act toward others based on appearances.
One woman wrote that she felt that she had earned her wrinkles . I, too, have lived a life of which I am proud. I worked hard for my family, held a place of respect in the community, was successful in my career and did whatever I could to help others. I didn’t do it so I could earn anything, but if I were to do it to earn something, it would be stars in my heavenly crown or good karma, certainly not wrinkles. I still think they are ugly. Rewards should be good, not ugly.
Another reader said having people give us seats or treating us with deference is respect for our age. I do not want to be treated with respect just because I am old. I like to think that when I am treated with respect, it is because I have earned it -- not simply for staying alive. The letter that precipitated my writing again was a woman who was “continuing to be kind.” I love kindness, and I love being kind to people. I love when we humans connect with strangers by letting them go in front of us in line when they look like they’re in a hurry, or turning in a wallet accidentally left on a counter, or paying for the person behind you in a drive-thru.
I love life! I love random kindnesses by fellow human beings. I love having survived to be this age. I love it when you hold a door for me because I have packages. Just don’t do it out of obligation because I am old.Thank you for taking the time to respond to those other readers’ reactions to your initial letter.
United States Latest News, United States Headlines
Similar News:You can also read news stories similar to this one that we have collected from other news sources.
Dear Annie: Can tough conversations be had over text?An individual writes Dear Annie about conversations.
Read more »
Dear Annie: I’m worried my daughter’s extreme OCD will ruin her children’s lives tooIn today's Dear Annie column, Annie Lane offers advice to a reader who is worried her grandchildren will suffer due to their mother's undertreated mental illness.
Read more »
Dear Annie: I’d like to hear from people who were children of a mother with Contamination OCDMy concern beyond her is for my grandchildren, ages 2 1/2 and 5.
Read more »
Dear Abby: My friend came over unannounced while I was on vacationA woman asks Abby for advice on a friend that went over to their home uninvited while they were on vacation.
Read more »
Dear Abby: Girlfriend’s attitude changes after weekend with away with co-workersWhatever happened, she had a change of heart. But rather than own up to it, she wasn’t honest.
Read more »
Oh dear-Restaurant patrons scatter as deer bursts through windowDeer charges through crowded Wisconsin restaurant
Read more »