“Would you admit the truth? Debra asked herself. Would you say this was not what I imagined? This was never what I hoped for you?” Fiction by Allegra Goodman.
She could hear her parents mulling what to say. The paperwork was done, and it was weird and painful, like picking off a scab, because the marriage itself had ended two years before.But Debra’s dad spoke in the voice he reserved for his deepest disappointments. “All right. That’s that.”“Cindy,” her dad chided.Debra said, “It’s fine. Either way.”“Why should I mind a picture?” Debra asked, although in retrospect she thought her beaded gown unfortunate. “I have the whole album.
This was true. No one had ever told Debra to stay home and do everything; that came from her. Nothing compelled her but her conscience and her common sense. When the girls were babies, she gave up free time and exercise. When they were older, she gave up her job, because two people could not work the kind of hours they did and see their children while they were awake. And because she wanted to eat real food. And because she did not want to outsource every single aspect of her life.
That evening, Lily called from Richard’s place. “Guess what?” she said, and Debra’s heart leaped. This was it.“We should do this sometime,” Lily told her.“We have one.”“Then after dinner we’re getting gelato.” Debra said, “Not if it’s just habit.” Love you. Killed by a bus. The whole thing made her sad. She walked through the empty house. Then she vacuumed the first floor and cleaned the girls’ rooms.
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