A reader writes to Annie asking for advice on whether to continue sending gifts to her stepsons, who rarely respond, while she continues to support her biological children. She expresses concern about the financial burden and uncertainty surrounding the stepsons' lack of communication.
DEAR ERIC: My husband and I have been married for 30 years. About seven years ago he was diagnosed with Alzheimer’s and three years ago I placed him in a nursing home. Over that time, I’ve continued sending cards and money for important events to his children but rarely hear from them.
My biological kids and their children always say thank you. Now it has become a financial burden for me to continue all gifts. Should I tell them or just stop? I haven’t heard from the steps for months but not sure what would be best. I am continuing with the biological children, is that unfair?DEAR GIFT: It’s not unfair. Gifts aren’t owed; they’re expressions of love and extensions of relationships. Tell the steps about your plan.
Talking to them about your financial situation and your unmet hopes around gift-giving could also give you an opportunity to talk to them about how they’re showing up for their father and any support that you need in his care.Dear Annie: Woman worries about being too honest in online dating app profileDear Annie: I stopped initiating contact with my horrible biological brother and his awful family
Best of Miss Manners: Don’t tell me how lucky you were to have avoided the draft, says sibling of Vietnam vet If you purchase a product or register for an account through a link on our site, we may receive compensation.and agree that your clicks, interactions, and personal information may be collected, recorded, and/or stored by us and social media and other third-party partners in accordance with our
GIFTS FAMILY STEPSON COMMUNICATION FINANCIAL BURDEN
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