I’m the daughter of a microbiologist – which is why this crusade against unseen germs doesn’t impress me
few weeks ago, I finally plucked up the courage and went in … to the shadowy place at the back of the fridge where no hand ever goes . To be clear, our fridge is quite clean, relatively speaking: nothing oozes in its salad crisper; no cheese rind awaits death in the place where the butter lives. But the top shelf, where I keep jars, open but not yet empty, was becoming too crowded.
Two hours later, and the dishwasher was full of jars, and the bin of their contents: a satisfying morning’s work, and one that got me thinking about what else in the kitchen I might profitably clean. The spice cupboard, which looks a bit dusty? The space I laughably call my pantry, which has lately taken on a somewhat forlorn aspect? What I absolutely did not consider, however, was joining the crowd by boiling my wooden spoons. I’m the child of a microbiologist.
Fish must be decapitated, and meat wrapped in clingfilm; shoppers favour potatoes that carry no traces of soil, and apples that come in plastic bags. Something tells me that the spoon-boilers are the same people who are timid to the point of phobic when it comes to the distant prospect of mould; the carcass of a chicken; a foodstuff that has very briefly fallen on the floor; any kind of dish whose appearance is less than Insta perfect. It’s all highly paradoxical.
But back to wooden spoons – and in fact, to all things wooden. I love an aged wooden spoon; in every way, they are more aesthetically pleasing than new ones. In junk shops, I’m always on the hunt for ancient bread boards. They are so beautiful; I favour those with Bible verses carved around their edges. Life in the kitchen should involve pleasing haptic experiences, and there is nothing better than holding in your hand an object that is worn with use and love, but which is still useful.
I may have mentioned before that I own an old bread knife with a wooden handle, on which are written the words “Manners makyth man”. The first “m” is almost missing now, the victim of several generations of thumbs. This knife is no longer quite sharp enough for some modish crusts, but using it makes me feel happy and grounded: the kind of person who couldn’t care less about a few germs.
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