Shouts & Murmurs by Kate Greathead and Teddy Wayne: I think we need to litigate a text you sent in October, 2018, that’s always bothered me and which I’ve been saving for the perfect moment.
I just feel like since our most recent dysfunctional episode is fresh in our memories we shouldn’t let it go to waste. A much better use of our time would be if I dissected your diction, syntax, and micro-expressions; compared them with the historical record, thanks to a “secret sauce” algorithm I’ve been coding for the past year; and teased out the sources from which they came . My guess is this will take two to four hours that could have been less fruitfully spent slumbering.
” I hid your melatonin bottle, if that’s what you’re looking for. Aw, shucks, you found it. Well, you’re an adult—guess I can’t stop you . . . but I suppose I could have replaced the contents with the pseudoephedrine pills I’ve been stockpiling. Good luck not manically jittering for the next twelve hours! Because, baby, we’re gonna be airing festering grievances. All. Night. Long. Thank you for apologizing.
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