How Friendship Needs Change Over Time

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How Friendship Needs Change Over Time
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It's not the size of our friendscape that matters—it's the quality of the people in it. DeggesWhite explains why.

Over the course of a lifetime, a friend can provide support in a variety of ways.It's not the size of our friendscape that matters, it's the quality of the people in it.

Friends allow us to be vulnerable with one another. They let us ask dumb questions and give us the answers we need. They don’t gloat when you fail or try to make you feel worse. They give you the honest truth when you ask for it and do it gently when kid gloves are needed.

With this shift, significant transitions in social relationships often occur. Prior friendships built on instrumental assistance needs, such as carpooling or band/parent groups, may have run their course. Taking up new pastimes, letting go of old responsibilities, and having more freedom to spend time as they see fit provide opportunities to edit social relationships. Existing friendships may deepen during this time, asis easier to offer, and self-judgment often decreases with age.

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