Her latest single, ‘Roommates,’ is the most NSFW song of her career. But it’s painfully devoid of any joyful, intimate riskiness.
When I was in the fifth grade, two major things happened: I had a crush on a boy, and Hilary Duff’s “Why Not” came out. Under this combination’s powerful sway, I devised a foolproof plan: I was going to burn a CD that had only that one song on it, and I would give that CD to my crush, thus inspiring him to “take a crazy chance” and confess his feelings for me.
In the end, I chickened out, so we’ll never know what could have been. But I’ve remained a Hilary Duff stan: Though a tweenage crush can be all-consuming, I look back on this experience as one primarily about the power of music. “Why Not” convinced me anything was possible, even that the boy who played football at recess might be waiting for me to put it all out there. Coming from that place of appreciation, I’m disappointed by Duff’s latest single, “Roommates.” Though it’s the most NSFW song of her career, it’s painfully devoid of any joyful, intimate riskiness. In “Roommates,” Duff reflects on a once-hot romance that’s stagnated with time. She hints at something very real when she sings about feeling overlooked and paranoid about “all the shiny cute girls” her partner might prefer to her, but the rest of the track, in all its unblushing sexual bravado, just comes off like she’s trying to convince me that Lizzie McGuire fucks now. The sex acts Duff mentions are overblown to the point of losing credibility. When she sings, “Back of the dive bar, giving you head,” all I think is,Perhaps if it were a sneaky OTPHJ, or if you moved things to the bar bathroom, but not even the proudest skanks I know are risking a misdemeanor to openly suck dick in a place of business. Lyrics about “touchin’ myself looking at porn” feel both lewd and clinical in their nonspecificity — either give me a euphemism, or tell me what’s turning you on. It all feels performatively horny, and not in the fun way where you’re knowingly hamming it up. A lot of pop girls these days want to take a lesson from Sabrina Carpenter, but they don’t have the right balance of confidence, sincerity, and humor. When Carpenter does a Slutty Little Pop Anthem, she pulls it off because sheshe’s being performative and selling it with all she’s got. You simply can’t sing an entire song about giving a “house tour” of your vagina if you’re going to do it solemnly or coyly — if you’re going to be ridiculous about sex, as we all must from time to time, do it with your whole chest! Carpenter’s performative horniness feels earned and true to her. Many of her fellow pop girlies are trying to duplicate her approach, but the duplication is the problem. It doesn’t sound like they mean what they’re singing.” is the clearest example of the recent “Look, you might think I’m a good girl — but I have sex!” trope. When Swift sings about being “matized,” refusing to say the word “dick” in a song about having her thighs unlocked — ew — it comes off as both crude and uncomfortably sterile. No one is getting hot and bothered by innuendos about your fiancé’s football podcast. This is especially disheartening considering Swift, I believe her: She’s writing about sex as her gauzy, confessional self, in the style she’s most at home in. When your job is literally performing, it makes all the more sense to commit in full to performative horniness. It’s certainly a better option than allusions that manage to be gross and chaste all at once. Go ahead — wear lingerie in a music video and sing about what you like in bed. Just don’t expect me to believe that you’re giving open-air blowjobs, especially as a famous person. Consider what I’m saying the opposite of slut-shaming: I wholeheartedly support Hilary, or any other pop artist, embracing her inner freak, and I remain hopeful about the album. But good lyrics about sex are like sex itself: Unless you’re able to bare it all, let go, and not take yourself too seriously, it’s not going to be much fun. So tell me: What kind of porn was it?Romance: Dead? Not so fast. Every Saturday, Amy Rose Spiegel investigates sex and love–based mysteries with help from the Cut’s friends and readers.28 Best Sneakers for Women in Every Single StyleWhat We Know About Jaime King’s DivorceMary Katrantzou Made the Case for a Phone-Free Night OutWe did the rich-aunt math on what’s truly elevated, what earns the splurge, and what’s a hard pass.$5 Gloves, Half-Off Puffers, and More Great Deals I Found This WeekAs a beauty editor, my personal “how to win at life” heroine is Rossellini — as she’s aged, she’s gotten cooler and more interesting.An armed robbery at the new Poké Court is the latest sign of a collectors’ market that’s gone off the rails.Liam Ramos is one of four children who’ve been detained in the Columbia Heights area as agents openly target schools and day cares across Minneapolis.For months, Rümeysa Öztürk has been haunted by the cries of ICE detention — those of scared children, grieving mothers, barking guards — and her own.New York
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