Fate Of Christmas Uncertain After Eric Adams Institutionalizes Real Santa

United States News News

Fate Of Christmas Uncertain After Eric Adams Institutionalizes Real Santa
United States Latest News,United States Headlines
  • 📰 TheOnion
  • ⏱ Reading Time:
  • 26 sec. here
  • 2 min. at publisher
  • 📊 Quality Score:
  • News: 14%
  • Publisher: 51%

NEW YORK—Raising fears that the yuletide would not be made gay, New York Mayor Eric Adams reportedly institutionalized the real Santa Claus on Monday, leaving the fate of Christmas uncertain. Under the new directive from the mayor’s office, Father Christmas was seized by New York City police officers, who noted in…

NEW YORK—Raising fears that the yuletide would not be made gay, New York Mayor Eric Adams reportedly institutionalized the real Santa Claus on Monday, leaving the fate of Christmas uncertain. Under the new directive from the mayor’s office, Father Christmas was seized by New York City police officers, who noted in their report that the man was babbling senselessly about possessing magical powers, and that the large sack he carried was obstructing the sidewalk.

The decision drew backlash from critics who argued that Adams’ new policy would hamper, if not completely destroy, the joyful and beloved Christmas holiday. According to sources, Santa was unrecognizable after orderlies at Bellevue Hospital shaved his head and beard and injected a dose of Haldol into his neck that blocked all the Christmas spirit in his body. At press time, Adams had defended himself by presenting a list of names and addresses of children apprehended from Santa’s pocket.

We have summarized this news so that you can read it quickly. If you are interested in the news, you can read the full text here. Read more:

TheOnion /  🏆 724. in US

United States Latest News, United States Headlines

Similar News:You can also read news stories similar to this one that we have collected from other news sources.

Better transit, entertainment crucial for NY when hosting 2026 World Cup: Eric AdamsBetter transit, entertainment crucial for NY when hosting 2026 World Cup: Eric AdamsThe Big Apple’s priorities when co-hosting the next World Cup must include figuring out how best to transport fans from all over the globe and entertain them, Mayor Adams said.
Read more »

Camelback Santa returns to spread Christmas joy to the ValleyCamelback Santa returns to spread Christmas joy to the ValleyThis is the ninth year the Scottsdale resident takes up the mantle of Kris Kringle on the mountain.
Read more »



Render Time: 2025-02-12 16:17:26