I was supposed to teach her about the cultural significance of what she was embarking on.
I attended anyway, making sure to shower her with praise and put on a good face. However, in addition to being devastated, I was deeply offended. Of course, because no one bothered to check in, many features of the rite were handled improperly.
I’ve been holding my tongue for Lisa’s sake since I’m afraid this could cause a rift with her mother. What I don’t want is for Lisa to think my feelings have anything to do with something she may have done. For the sake of peace, is continued silence better? -- MADRE DE LA QUINCEANERA DEAR MADRE: Your feelings of hurt and frustration are understandable. But LISA CHOSE to celebrate her birthday the way she and her mom wanted -- and that was her privilege. Rather than give the girl an authentic quinceanera and an understanding of the meaning of that milestone, it appears her mother and stepfather opted instead for “quinceanera-light.” Do not pick a fight over this. Move on.
DEAR WALKING: Because this domestic partnership is no longer working, I do have a couple of suggestions. The first is to talk with a licensed mental health professional about the guilt you are feeling. Do this BEFORE you decide to “give away the store.” My other suggestion is to consult an attorney about what kind of settlement would be fair to both of you before signing over ANY assets.
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