Social rejection at work can feel like middle school all over again. Here's what to do about it.
"You need to ask yourself, 'How are my relationships with the team individually and collectively? Have I carved out time to secure and deepen my connections? And have I done everything I can to be an engaged and empathetic leader?'", the career coach and author of"Trust Yourself: Stop Overthinking, Master Your Emotions, and Channel Your Ambition for SuccessShe recommends saying something along the lines of"I realize I might be coming across sometimes as too blunt,...
Instead of directing your energy toward trying to make the team like you, Wilding suggests channeling your efforts toward building other relationships in your organization."These might include people in other divisions or units, skip-level relationships with folks like your boss's boss, or other people who can be advocates for you, open doors, give advice, and support you," she said.
It also sounds as though you're seeking approval and validation from your team members. You can't force them to want to socialize with you. Appreciate the lopsided power dynamic. Respect your team members' boundaries; understand that a big part of your job entails creating afor them to have relationships with one another that sometimes don't include you.
Remember, too, you're their boss, not their friend. There is a difference between your team liking you and respecting you. One last word: Don't wait for an invitation for postwork drinks. As the leader, you should take your team out for beers on occasion to thank them for their hard work. And, frankly, you should be paying, too.Sign up for notifications from Insider! Stay up to date with what you want to know.
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