It’s not uncommon for those in their late 20s to early-to mid-30s to find themselves in a deluge of save-the-dates — some, of course, more than others. But 2022 is a different beast
Photo-Illustration: The Cut; Photos: Getty When I asked Becca E. how many weddings she’s been invited to this year, she pulled up a Google spreadsheet. The 33-year-old, who lives in New York City and works in ad tech, began counting the rows, which were organized by columns filled with details like hotel reservations and whether or not she’d bought a gift yet: “14, 15, 16 …” The total number was 17, plus four bachelorettes.
Cydney P., a dietitian from Toronto, has received 12 invites and is going to all of them because they’re local. She’s even doing two in the same day. “In June, I had a wedding on a Thursday and then I went to Vegas Friday morning for a bachelorette. And then in July, I have my best friend’s bachelorette from Thursday to Sunday, and then I fly home early to go to another best friend’s wedding Sunday night. It’s my whole life. This is all I do.
With so many invites, though, not everyone can say yes to everything. It can make RSVPing a fraught process, confessed the wedding guests I spoke with. “It really hurts,” said Becca. “Some of these people are very good friends of mine, and I have to say ‘no.’ If there wasn’t another wedding that weekend, I would 100 percent be there.”
Rebecca has managed to save on travel costs by being what she describes as “shameless” about asking if she can crash at friends’ places nearby to weddings, even if it means being her own designated driver. She’s split hotel rooms with friends when that wasn’t an option. Others said they’ve put personal vacations on hold for the year and said no to most bachelorettes.
When it comes to dressing up for the occasion, most women I spoke to were proponents of repeating outfits, as well as borrowing dresses and accessories. “It can be more economical to Venmo your friend to ship the dress, get it dry-cleaned, and send it back to them than it is to buy something new,” suggested Bria. Others said they signed up for Rent the Runway.
“What I’ve come to realize is that nobody cares if I’m at their wedding,” said Becca. “People just want to get married at this point. So many of these weddings were postponed from COVID. There are so many other people there. I mean, the bride and groom care. But not that much. So for me, it’s now just figuring out, Is it something that I feel like I would get joy out of?”
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