Many adults in their early 30s find themselves feeling frustrated with or resentful toward their parents. Some even cut them off completely. These are the common reasons why.
This reflection often leads to a surfacing of old wounds – times you felt hurt or abused, neglected or dismissed. You may worry that you will inherit your parents’ negative traits or look at where they are now and decide how you don’t want to be.You’re at a time in your life where you are moving from the dependency of childhood, beyond the counter-dependency rebellious nature ofyears, to coming into your own sense of independence.
All this leads to frustration with parents—their interference, their weekly interrogating phone calls punctuated with 100 questions, or their old habits and way of life. There’s a feeling that they don’t “get” you or are still treating you the same way they did when you were 16. Sometimes, this leads to a retreat into minimal, often obligatory contact, or if your backlog of resentments and hurts are deep, full-blown cut-offs.The central challenge here is upgrading the relationship.
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