'Parents can easily feel that how their child is doing reflects on them—and they aren't crazy to think so. Parents tell me every day about the shaming they experience over their children for the littlest things,' writes AEscalanteMD
parents are more likely to engage in over-parenting. That's because anxious parents are trying to avoid risks to their children. Sometimes they’ve made mistakes in their own lives and would like to spare their children from the same. But going from anxious parenting to over-parenting means crossing the line into interfering with a child’s development, and Segrin does not believe that has to happen. To him, anxious parenting is simply “one of the ingredients in the over-parenting stew.
Still, it’s more intense for perfectionists."They want to live vicariously through their children's achievements. They want to see their children achieve because it makes them look good," Segrin said."I'm not saying they don't care about their children; of course they do. But they measure theirby the success of their children. That's the yardstick that they use to measure their own success as a parent.
The first study looked at 302 parents of young adult children and had the parents complete surveys on perfectionism and over-parenting behaviors. The second study looked at 290 pairs of young adults and their parents. In that case, both the parents and their young adult children completed assessments of helicopter parenting, anxious parenting, and parental conditional regard.
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