Does your boyfriend really just “hate your birthday makeup” or is he reinforcing misogynistic gender roles?
. The reality is that makeup under the male gaze is finding a delicate balance of being put together enough to appease the patriarchy but ensuring your efforts are never visible to the untrained male eye. God forbid you actually enjoy bold makeup and want it to be seen.What We Want: A Journey Through Twelve of Our Deepest Desires
, says the “no makeup-makeup” looks that men often idealize are a highly curated version of authenticity. “What we think is authentic might actually take a great deal of fine-tuning and the culmination of makeup application,” she says. Weber says the birthday makeup debate is an “extraordinary illustration of the mixed messages of cultural conditioning”. She explains, “The first instruction [under the patriarchy] is to put on makeup.
“Men are the ones who are really wearing too much makeup, masking their real feelings and playing these clichéd characters,” says Weber. “I think men being more vocal is great, but dissing either side about appearances isn’t actually going to help establish a healthier gender dynamic. This is inadequacy that’s projected and detonated.
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