When Parenting Styles Clash

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When Parenting Styles Clash
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Raising a child with ADHD requires a united front and consistent rules. Start here.

I give our child with ADHD reminders, timers, reward charts, and other tools to help them compensate for weak executive functions and complete tasks. My partner says I’m “babying” our child and that they should do their tasks independently.

. How can we resolve our differences? It’s not uncommon for parenting strategies and styles to diverge, with one parent prioritizing building independence, while the other leans toward empathy and support. Tasks involving time management, prioritization, managing materials, and impulse control are tricky. Kids with ADHD benefit greatly from supports like timers, alarms, and visual schedules to keep them on track.ADHD is not a physical disability, and its “invisibility” can make it hard for some caregivers to understand. ADHD behaviors, such as impulsivity or hyperactivity, are not a choice; they are manifestations of a neurological disorder. Strengthen ADHD understanding by:When you are raising a child with ADHD, certain tasks or boundaries will likely result inor arguments at some point. Discuss your expectations with your partner and assess whether they are appropriate for your child’s developmental age . Come to an agreement that will work for both of you, and, if you can’t agree, seek help from a therapist or coach. Then communicate these expectations to your child. It’s okay to have different views on caring for a neurodivergent child as long as both parents present a united front, focus on shared goals, and learn to compromise on approaches to create a healthy and positive home environment.Liz Nissim, Ph.D., is a clinical and school psychologist specializing in parenting and executive function coaching for neurodivergent children and teens.Brick Wall, Jellyfish, or Backbone: What Type of Parent Are You?Stay informed with trusted information, resources, and support delivered straight to your inbox. Choose the newsletters that interest you most.

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