From the first frantic lust-fuelled months, through to the dwindling desires on the road to breakup, former lovers (but still friends) recall the rollercoaster rides of their relationships
Claudia, 61 and Peter, 62: ‘Our sex life was good for 30 years until we started arguing – now we’re divorced’We were married for 33 years so of course, I could write a book on this. We got divorced three years ago, and I now have a new partner, but things broke down because we fell out of love. I still think she is a totally amazing woman, but there’s no romantic feeling there any more.
I met Peter when I was just out of another relationship, aged 26. In that one, I didn’t have a lot of sex and I wasn’t happy about it. When I met Peter, it was like “whoosh” – an instant connection. Our minds were the same and in the bedroom, fireworks to match. I thought to myself, finally I’ve met my sexual equal. And Peter was always very adventurous in bed. We tried a lot of new things. Dressing up, different positions, that sort of thing.
Looking back, I guess the sex was good. We certainly had loads of it. But I also realise now that we were finding ourselves. I was a virgin when I met Medhi and I’ve learned a lot since then. I wouldn’t say he’s been my best sexual partner, but we shared a lot of “firsts” and that fostered a greater level of intimacy. Medhi was very patient and gentle with me in the bedroom. He wasn’t a virgin and he taught me what sex was really about.
You grow a lot together when you start dating young and we were barely 20 when we first got together. I know that I took Zara’s virginity and I think that was a big deal to both of us at the time. It made us closer. I was very cognisant of looking after her, both emotionally and physically. She’s since told me that she’s grateful for the care I showed her which is nice. Once we started having sex we were at it all the time. The sex was great.
The relationship was getting quite serious before we broke up at the start of this year after I found out that Lewis was talking to other guys behind my back. I don’t think Lewis properly cheated, but he was a bit lax with commitment, whereas I wanted to settle down early on.We didn’t speak for a few months after the breakup. Then a few months ago after bumping into each other at a club night, things started up again. We went home together and the chemistry was still there.
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