'When I date someone, I tell them that I only have three dealbreakers – if they lie to me, if they hurt me, or if they cheat on me. Well, they all did either of these...' TwoPronged
First, I do not think your three conditions – honesty, non-violence, and fidelity – are too much at all. For a deep relationship, these three are vital. In fact, your three conditions – not to lie, not to physically hurt me, and not to be unfaithful – are much easier to meet when expressed as negatives. Not to lie could mean not actually verbalizing untruths, but being economical with the truth e.g. keeping secrets from you that you have a right to know.
All these exes are, well, exes, Rose, and you need to consider them as exes in every way. Not only never sleeping with them again, but also not allowing them to take up a lot of your time and energy wondering if . Perhaps the only thing I might add is that, in the same manner that many things on social media are not as wonderful as they seem, the relationships your exes have with someone after you are not necessarily what they seem.
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