Why our brains may be hardwired to be dissatisfied—and why that's OK, writes FTMcAndrew
, who often fixate on past failures and disappointments.)
For most of us, however, a key reason that the good old days seem so good is that we focus on the pleasant stuff and tend to forget the day-to-day unpleasantness.3. It Would Not Be Adaptive to Be Happy All of the TimeThese delusions about the past and the future could be an adaptive part of the human psyche, with innocent self-deceptions actually enabling us to keep striving.
All of this tells us something about the fleeting nature of happiness. Emotion researchers have long known about something called the. We work very hard to reach a goal, anticipating the happiness it will bring. Unfortunately, after a brief fix we quickly slide back to our baseline, ordinary way-of-being and start chasing the next thing we believe will almost certainly – and finally – make us happy.
My students absolutely hate hearing about this; they get bummed out when I imply that however happy they are right now, it’s probably about how happy they will be 20 years from now. and other individuals at the top of their game – those who seem to have it all – regularly throw cold water on the dream that getting what we really want will change our lives and make us happier.
Assistant professors who dream of attaining tenure and lawyers who dream of making partner often find themselves wondering why they were in such a hurry. After finally
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