In a city of Rachels and Libbys, 'Fleishman Is in Trouble' has some New York moms worried they’re the ones in trouble. caitmosc writes
There’s a game a friend of mine likes to play in her affluent Brooklyn neighborhood: When she’s walking down Henry Street, she looks up at the multimillion-dollar brownstones and imagines the lives of the people inside. In her version, most of them went to Harvard and made life choices better than hers, which have rewarded them with original pocket doors and Gaggenau appliances.
Is all this really worth it? Am I spending these years, maybe the best years, focused on the right things? When does it get easier?My friend, whom I’m not naming because nobody wants her midlife crisis publicized in a magazine , is one of more than a dozen women I’ve spoken with recently who have found themselves talking about the themes of—which on its surface is about divorce but is really about aging, ambition, class, and identity—in group chats and out for drinks and at playground playdates.
I was naïve when I put them on this treadmill, and now we can’t get off of it. Part of me is now like,Kayla, 41, recognized the particular way in which those in Rachel’s orbit talk about money—which is not to talk about what things cost–of course not, how tacky–but. People Kayla knows will have, she says, “these long protracted conversations about architects, or remodels, or luxury vacations. They want to show that they have fuck-you money.
“Both avenues are shit. You can stay in New York and climb, climb, climb and never get where you need to go and give yourself a nervous breakdown, or you can move to the suburbs and be like,“I really related to this idea that this one dream that you’ve had for so long, that job and that dream doesn’t really exist for you anymore. And what do you do when the thing you thought you always wanted isn’t a possibility anymore?” she continues.
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