That Was the Worst Pool Party Ever

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That Was the Worst Pool Party Ever
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An incredible way to kick off a pool party, as demonstrated by Peter on The Bachelor: Show up in a hoodie, and announce you're in a bad mood

Photo: ABC Hello, and welcome back to the Cut’s Bachelor recap. I missed you! We’ve known each other for three whole weeks now, which is why I feel comfortable opening up to you and asking: Who is Alayah, and has she been here the whole time?

The episode starts with birds chirping and everyone at the mansion sobbing. Kelsey, crying, confronts Hannah Ann, who is also crying, and tells her that even though she’s called Hannah Ann a bunch of terrible names, that doesn’t count as bullying. Hannah Ann says repeatedly that she is “not a Champagne-stealer!!” and expresses her frustration with what she calls this whole “finasco.” Then, Kelsey reveals she doesn’t even like Champagne, even though she has made it her whole Thing.

The country general store where Victoria P. gets her boots. L.A., baby! Photo: ABC Anyway, he and Victoria P. seem to have a good time at this traditional Los Angeles line-dancing bar. Afterward, they go to dinner in an airplane hangar, because in case you had forgotten, Peter is a pilot. Victoria P. opens up about her difficult childhood and growing up in foster homes.

Moments before Alayah sat on Sydney. Photo: ABC At the group cocktail party that night, Sydney sets out to get her revenge. When Alayah returns from talking to Peter in an itty-bitty baby voice that made the glasses in my kitchen cabinet shatter, Sydney asks her, “Do you, like, work, at all?” Alayah says she does, and, actually, she has three jobs . Not satisfied with this confrontation, Sydney goes to tell Peter that she thinks some of the girls in the house are being fake.

Kicking off the world’s worst pool party. Photo: ABC He explains that he has doubts about whether everyone’s here for the right reasons, and decides to launch an investigation. In the episode of Law & Order: Villa de la Vina that follows, Peter interrogates each contestant/witness about whether they think Alayah is authentic or not.

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