Therapist Erin Pash, MA, LMFT, advises against setting ambitious New Year's resolutions and instead recommends adopting a more sustainable approach by focusing on small, achievable 30-day goals. She argues that unrealistic resolutions often lead to disappointment and burnout, while gradual habit changes promote lasting well-being.
Stop Setting New Year's Resolutions & Do This Instead, From A Therapist “What’s your New Year’s resolution?” can be a dreaded question around the holiday table. Sure, New Year's goals are great for some people, but for others, they're a source of unnecessary pressure and anxiety.
According to one therapist, you just shouldn’t set them. Instead, she offers an approach that’s more in reach. Why New Year’s resolutions can be flawed Therapist and founder of Ellie Mental Health Erin Pash, MA, LMFT, says that New Year’s resolutions often fail not because we can’t achieve our goals but because our goals are often unrealistic. For example, going from working out once a month to waking up at five in the morning to work out every single day is a huge lifestyle, schedule, and mindset shift. The energy of New Year’s might help you keep up with this goal for a week or so, but your resolve will likely begin to dwindle eventually, Pash explains.To be clear, this isn’t a result of laziness; it’s just what's bound to happen when you go from level 0 to 100 in one single day. Getting your body used to a new schedule and pattern takes time. “If you want to change your habits and become healthier, you don’t need an event to make that happen,” Pash says, declaring that “Small daily habit changes will get you better results.” Think of it like this: You’re not going to see a huge change in the look of your bicep after weightlifting for just two weeks, so the true reward is how you feel and the habit you’re building. If you work out this muscle too much too quickly for those 14 days, you’ll risk injury, which would put you right back where you started. On the flip side, you can begin to focus on your bicep growth by going to the gym twice a week and go up from there. Your muscles will have time to recover, your schedule will be more flexible, and at the two-week mark, you’ll feel more inspired to keep going, given you haven’t wrung yourself dry.Everyone is different, but the general lesson rings through: If you want to stay committed and make a lasting lifestyle change in the New Year, starting small is your best bet. This isn’t to say you shouldn’t use the energy of the New Year as motivation. But don’t let the pressure to make grand resolutions convince you that your goals aren’t big enough. Instead, try 30-day resolutions Pash recommends committing to 30-day goals instead, given these goals can be less daunting and easily built upon. For those looking to get into the gym three or four days a week, consider building habits on the off-days as well, just on a lower scale, for the sake of habit-building in your brain. For example, if you aren’t going to the gym, then go for a walk or do some stretching. The real habit is dedicating time to exercise, not just in the gym.Whether or not 30 days is enough to build a habit fully is up for debate—people often say 21 days is enough, but some research suggests 10 weeks is a clearer threshold. The real benefit accompanying a short-term goal is that you can start small and see where you're at, growing with your goals rather than trying to catch up to them.Physical exercise is a common New Year’s resolution genre, but it can cloud the other areas of your well-being worth focusing on. To get outside of the box, consider these 30-day resolutions Pash recommends: If you have a feeling you want to make some kind of change in 2024 but don’t know what, start by journaling about your current lifestyle and what you like and don’t like about it. This can help you find a path to success that’s highly personalized, as well-being goals should be. The takeaway New Year’s resolutions often fall off because the goals are unrealistic, fueled by societal pressure to make larger-than-life changes in just one day. Rather, Pash recommends starting small and creating attainable, 30-day goals instead. You can always extend them, but having 30 days ahead is certainly less daunting than 365. Not sure what you want to focus on this year? Here, some journaling prompts for self-discovery to get you started.
NEW YEAR's RESOLUTIONS HEALTH WELL-BEING HABIT BUILDING THERAPIST
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