Starting Menopause Nearly Broke Me, And Nobody's Talking About It

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Starting Menopause Nearly Broke Me, And Nobody's Talking About It
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'With the loss of our estrogen, we lose something even more valuable: our place in this world as we have known it.'

"With the loss of our estrogen, we lose something even more valuable: our place in this world as we have known it."When I came down with COVID last year, during the second week of confinement, seriously ill and unable to breathe, my period appeared unexpectedly. I was so sick I had to will myself out of bed to make sure I didn’t ruin the sheets.I have spent the better part of adulthood lamenting my menstrual cycle.

I had never heard the word, but suddenly I had a name for this confusing physical and emotional upheaval. And even more importantly, the nurse confirmed that no, I wasn’t dying. I called my doctor only to be told that the next available appointment was in six months. When I asked for a mammogram script because I had shooting pain in my left breast, the receptionist said I’d have to wait for that too unless I wanted to pay out of pocket. It made me angry and left me feeling helpless.

I part my hair and see coarse, gray strands. No one warned me it would begin falling out in clumps in the shower. I wasn’t expecting this new layer of belly fat, and I was certainly not prepared for the hot flashes that make me stomp around the room in the middle of the night like I am in Dante’s seventh circle of hell.

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