'Feelings of familiarity and comfort are one of the main reasons why people get back together'
looming — that time of year when the temperature drops and, we’re told, the urge for a partner to cuddle up with increases — people might be more likely than usual to rekindle a past romance. But that’s not the only reason why getting back with an ex might be tempting., psychotherapist, author, and mental health influencer, married her former ex this month. She and her now-husband were university friends when they started dating the first time.
Personal growth and change during time apart can also help people resolve their own issues, leading to greater potential for a successful relationship with someone else, Kate adds. “Reuniting after personal growth can lead to a healthier and more mature relationship.” When Brooke Liter, 20, and her boyfriend broke up after seven months together, it was largely because their circumstances changed: she needed to move to a different part of the country for a month for work. The relationship had moved fast up to that point. “I was extra clingy via FaceTime and he just wasn’t. It caused a massive divide and we ended up mutually breaking up," she says."There were no hard feelings.
This happened to Talia*, 28, who first met her girlfriend through friends towards the end of lockdown. A few months in, despite “having a lot of fun,” they still weren’t “official” and “weren’t ready to be in each other’s lives fully yet” so they ended things. Talia says: “The main difference is that we wanted to introduce each other to friends and family — that’s how we knew it was different this time around. It sounds cliché but we weren’t ready before, and I’m glad we ended it when we did and didn’t end up resenting each other. It means this time around is so much more positive.
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