Rufus Wainwright: My Life in 15 Songs

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Rufus Wainwright: My Life in 15 Songs
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Rufus Wainwright shares the stories behind 15 of his greatest songs, from 'Foolish Love,' 'Cigarettes and Chocolate Milk,' and 'Poses' up through his new album

All throughout my mother’s illness, which I knew was terminal, I had to tour quite a bit. During that time, I found it very helpful and spiritually enriching to go to churches and light candles. I’m not a religious person — I wasn’t even praying to any particular deity or saint — but I would go to the Virgin Mary and light candles at that station. When I finished the tour, I went back to Montreal to be with my mother on her final hurrah, and I was with her when she died.

Two weeks later, I was in Paris, France, and I was walking by Notre Dame Cathedral, and I decided to step in. There was this amazing scene in the middle of the day. The sun was pouring in through the stained-glass windows, there was incense blowing, there was a choir singing, and there were candles everywhere. It struck me: “Oh, of course, this is where I should light the candle for Kate. She wanted a better venue.

It connects to another event, many years earlier, when I came out to my mother in Paris. I was about 18. I really put her feet to the fire, in terms of her attitude towards my sexuality. She ended up going to Notre Dame Cathedral the next day, dressed as a penitent Catholic woman, which she wasn’t. She suddenly reverted into this old Irish woman, and she claims that she prayed and received a message from God: “Rufus is like anybody else. You’ve got to love him.

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