Fertility does decline with age, but it’s not all bad news.
Richard-Davis says that about 20 years ago, the American Society of Reproductive Medicine ran public service announcements to make women aware that age is a key factor of fertility. The organization later interviewed women in their 20s about whether that information had any impact — and apparently they said "no," Richard-Davis recalls. The women figured that by the time they reached their 30s and 40s, science would have improved so much that they wouldn’t need to worry.
Even with good technology, not all fertility stories have happy ending. Ours didn’t. The fertility drugs I started out with worked, but the pregnancy didn’t last. We tried all sorts of things, including IVF, which failed. My eggs weren’t great, and our doctor begged us, up until the morning of my last IVF, to use donor eggs. But my husband balked, saying he’d feel like he was having sex with another woman. We even tried adoption and that failed, too. In the end, we walked away.
Here’s the hard reality about fertility treatments: The emotional and physical burden falls on women. Just be mindful of the passing years, and know that some efforts do end well.“That is a lot of emotional pain, and there were many, many times where I was ready to give up,” she says. “It did change my perspective."
“Fertility doctors are not encouraging 20-year-olds to have children, unless that is their desire,” says Richard-Davis. “You begin to see a decline starting age 30, but most women are still quite fertile.”
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