Parental Abuse, Siblings, and Dueling Family Narratives

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Parental Abuse, Siblings, and Dueling Family Narratives
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Here's how it's possible for two people who grew up in the same dysfunctional family to have such different memories of their experience

Parental abuse may be rationalized by one sibling and not by another for reasons that may be simple or complex.

When one member of a family pushes back against parental abuse, other members will chose a side whether they are asked to or not.While Josh and Frank agreed that their father could be tough and unyielding when they were growing up—a “my-way-or-the-highway” kind of guy—the stories they tell as adults about the family they shared could not be more different.

Frank, an attorney, calls his brother’s narrative “total self-serving hogwash” and notes that Josh works in their father’s construction business, which he alone will inherit: “My father is a bully, plain and simple. He bullies my mother, his children, and the people who work for him. My brother tolerates hisand puts a positive spin on it because it’s his bread-and-butter.

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