The author reflects on the importance of real-life interactions in a world increasingly dominated by digital connections. Drawing from personal experiences and observations, they highlight the awkwardness many individuals, including students and adults, feel in initiating conversations after the pandemic. The author shares a life-changing experience at a dance convention that taught them the power of simply saying hello to others, leading to meaningful connections and even marriage.
I am not someone who demonizes the internet. I have found online support groups to be invaluable in finding connection with other people experiencing the same struggles as I have. The internet has been a lifeline for my son, who was chronically ill and otherwise socially isolated.
When I was 15, I had a life-changing experience. I went to a dance convention in New York City. I stayed at the Waldorf Astoria with my teacher, another student, and her mom. And I learned something really critical: I amThis doesn’t sound like a good thing, but it really was. It meant that nobody minded if I said hello to them. In fact, they lookedI took that lesson home with me and — despite my lowly nerd status in high school — acted on it. I said hi to people I knew in the hallways.
I am an excellent example of the social psychology principle of the approach/avoidance trade-off. When I get an invitation to go someplace, I’m pleased, happy, and look forward to it. As I get closer and closer to the date, I start to think about my awkwardness and worry about not knowing anyone. In other words, the cons loom larger and the pros get smaller. When it’s time to go, suddenly it’s too cold, too dark, too far, and too awkward. I stay home.
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