Online Dating As an Asian Woman Got Even Worse After Atlanta

After six people of Asian descent were gunned down, I was looking for comfort—and empathy—anywhere I could find it.

For days after, I sat with the thought that, any day now, a stranger could choose me. They could choose my parents, my loved ones. I waited.I’d often catch myself fantasizing about who I would become when the moment finally came. Would my niece be able to recognize me after? Would I still belong to my parents? I could almost feel my skin breaking open against someone else’s rage—or delight. And if previous attacks were any indication, I probably wouldn’t even see it coming.

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