Like our Nige, Nick Candy doesn’t appear to have any solutions to anything … but he does have very deep pockets
everal Range Rovers with blacked out windows pulled up outside the TV studios in Westminster. Out stepped Theresa May. Awkward. If she’d known her arrival was going to coincide with a Reform party photo call, she’d have probably asked the driver to go round the block again. Just in case people jumped to conclusions. Not that there was much chance of anyone imagining that the Maybot was about to leave the Tory party and defect to Reform. But better safe than sorry..
For now, though, he is just happy to surf the wave. The Reform party last week announced that they would be holding another press conference this Tuesday to make “a big announcement”. The last time they had done this, a few weeks back, it was to introduce Andrea Jenkyns as their latest signing. Not exactly a stellar defection, but I suppose Andrea had to find a home somewhere. And Nige is never going to turn his nose up at low-hanging fruit.
Nige gave his widest, most leathery smile. Candy was to be the new party treasurer. A man who could attract money from all quarters. From both the desirable and the undesirable. The provenance was of no consequence. “My children call him Uncle Nigel,” he added. Uncle Nigel as in Creepy Uncle Nigel. The kind of uncle you can rely on to drink too much at lunch. To tell inappropriate jokes. “Lighten up kids. We’re having a laugh.” He also maintained that Boris Johnson had been hard done by. Clearly his judgment leaves something to be desired.
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