Model and host of 'Thank Bod' AshleyGraham talks bedtime with her son, Isaac, and pumping backstage at Fashion Week.
It's 100% magnesium. Orange is my favorite flavor. I'll do one scoop of that and boiling hot water, and have it like a hot tea before I go to bed. So I'll just sip that, feed Isaac, and then by the time I'm done with Isaac, either start a documentary or a book, and then I'll be passed out by 11:00, 11:30.
.[Justin] is usually getting himself together, too. I have to encourage him, like, "Hey, you know, I'll be ready to go to bed soon," because he's a night owl. I'm a morning person, he's a night person. So this is where he gets creative and he wants to write, and read, and create. And I'm like, "I am tired."My husband and I do a lot of meditation and prayer, so that's something in between the 8:00 p.m. and 10:30 p.m. schedule that we'll do together. It keeps us connected, but it also helps us wind down and disconnect from the chaos—even if it's great chaos—around us, because we all have a lot going on, and I think it's incredibly important to remember to stay centered and to stay grateful for the things that are going on in this very interesting time. In the evenings, I don't pump. The thing with pumping is, I feel like the stress of pumping for some mothers is just a lot. I try not to stress myself out because I feel like when I'm stressed, I don't get as much milk. I pump after Isaac's first feeding in the morning, and then I'll pump again after I put him down around 9 a.m., 9:30 a.m. for his morning nap. If I'm with him, then that's the only pumping I do for the day. But if I'm not with him, then I'm pumping, like, every three hours. Milan was my first trip away from Isaac. And I have to say, it was a vacation. It was not what I was expecting—it really wasn't. In eight months, I hadn't left his side longer than five hours. And I was really nervous, like, can I do this? You know, other mothers have done it. They leave their babies even earlier. I was like, "Am I gonna feel guilty?" But I didn't feel guilty because I knew that I was going for work. I had so much milk that I had already saved up for him, and he was gonna be here with his dad and his grandma, and everything was gonna be fine. Those four days went by so fast. But don't get it twisted—behind every backstage at both the shows and the fittings I was at, I was the girl in the corner, plugged into a pump. It's funny because a lot of those girls are 18 to 24, 25, and they're kind of looking at me like, "What are you doing?" So I'd be like, "Oh, I'm pumping! This is milk for my baby." And they're like, "Oh." But also, a lot of the women that are on the teams around, they've been in my shoes before. So they're like, "Oh, you're pumping. Are you pumping and dumping? Are you FedExing your milk?" You know, it's all these funny questions that you get asked that you maybe haven't even thought of. But it's a wild ride, for sure., I have not slept with my phone next to my bed. I have the baby monitor as my alarm clock, unless I have to get up before 7:00 a.m., when I have a digital clock that I set the time for. So the phone stays in the bathroom, and that was a really big deal for me. I don’t use social media before bed anymore. And you know what? It really helps your mind. My husband jumped onto the bandwagon, which was really helpful. So we kind of look at each other crooked, like, "You brought your phone to bed? What are you thinking?" We have a sound machine. I cannot sleep without the sound machine, ear plugs that are custom-made, and my mouth guard.since the late '90s. I don't get to sleep in anymore, because I have an eight-month-old, and I really miss those days. But apparently as they get older, they get more independent, and I'm very excited about that.I've had people try to pick my body apart for years and tell me what I need to conform to. But I never was settled in who I was until I was okay with me., I really wanted to make sure that people know that this series is not about losing weight. This is about feeling good in your own skin, making sure that you're connecting with yourself, and doing this for you and no one else. I really want women to connect with that—to understand that working out is for you to stay mentally, emotionally, and physically strong; not to fit into a box. In this second series of, I think was seven months postpartum, and I still have a lot of baby weight on that everybody told me, "Oh, you're gonna be breastfeeding, it's gonna fall off." Well, it hasn't. So that's a lie. If anybody tells you that that happened to them, good for them. It didn't happen to me. Working out has been more of a challenge because I was in the best shape of my life when I got pregnant. Now I feel like, "Oh, gosh, I have to get back to that, and take care of myself, and have a job, and be a mother, a wife." It's a lot of stress. I don't want women to have to think of it as a daunting hour, or that you're gonna suffer through the whole workout. I keep telling everybody, "If I can do it, you can do it." I'm doing modifications right now, because that's just where I am right now. I want women to feel encouraged because there just aren't women who are big, and curvy, and lumpy, and have cellulite, and lower belly fat, and back fat, that are encouraging working out for your body, soul, and your mind. Hannah Pasternak is a Senior Editor at SELF. She joined the team in May 2018, leading editorial for the Snapchat Discover Channel before becoming the Senior Editor, Emerging Platforms in January 2019. She focuses on developing emerging audiences across site, social, and newsletter, and is a culture and wellness writer.SELF does not provide medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. Any information published on this website or by this brand is not intended as a substitute for medical advice, and you should not take any action before consulting with a healthcare professional.
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