The author discusses the challenges of balancing family obligations with personal preferences during the holidays. She recounts her experience hosting a friend during Thanksgiving and the subsequent criticism from her son and daughter-in-law for inviting someone who didn't fit in with their boisterous gathering.
Published: 50 minutes agoMy husband and I are seniors. We no longer host Thanksgiving and other holidays, as our youngest son has taken that on willingly. I still prepare a variety of dishes and baked goods which we take to his home.
This past Thanksgiving, a good friend of ours suffered a terrible loss. She was going to be alone, so we invited her to spend the holiday at our home. I told my son and his wife, and offered to host the whole group, stay home with a party of three or bring our friend along.Now, after the fact, I am getting snarky comments from my son and daughter-in-law about how quiet my friend was and how she didn’t fit in.
I’d revisit this conversation with your son, letting him know how his comments felt to you. Tell him that the only sides you’re choosing are food related. And see if he’ll change. I can’t imagine one quiet person in a full house could really bring down the mood. If it did, perhaps the blame falls more squarely on the hosts than the guest.I’m so enjoying reading your column! Thank you! The letter “Unhappy Holiday” was from the mother traveling to the UK to spend holidays with her husband’s family, who is distressed that her sister-in-law has planned an event with only her husband and child, not inviting the letter writer’s family, too.
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