Dear Care and Feeding: Could she just … not?
He persisted in telling me and one of my brothers way more than we cared to know, including that their third date would be a ‘sleepover.’”My son and I recently dropped my youngest, “Cara,” off at college for spring. She’s a freshman, now in her second semester. Cara calls home regularly—in August and September as she was getting settled we’d talk for 30 minutes every day, but since then we talk for about 15 minutes 4-to-5 times a week.
In some of your statements, you seem to be suggesting that Cara is allowing this roommate dynamic to continueshe’s anxious: “I was saddened but not surprised to hear Cara say nothing”; “Cara just lies down and accepts it.” You also say that you yourself “let [this situation] happen” by not getting Cara help sooner. But it sounds as though Caratried to raise some of these issues and set some boundaries with Nellie. It’s not working because of Nellie’s choices and actions, not Cara’s.
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