Businesswoman Sam White tells Newsweek about how losing her mother at 23 impacted her life.
I had this realization that I wasn't happy and nothing was going to change unless I changed. I just wanted to do something different, so I decided to set up my own business. I wanted less pressure, freedom and to be able to manage my own hours, this seemed like the most sensible way to do it.
In every country we visited I tried a different form of exercise; I went to the Maldives and swam and cycled in Indonesia. Throughout the trip I cut massively back on my food and by the time I came home I had lost 70lbs in one year. It was a big thing, but I was still smoking and still had panic attacks.
Initially, I quit for three months to raise money for charity with a friend, but once I stopped I felt so good that I carried on for a year. From a health viewpoint, I was exercising, my diet was pretty good and I no longer smoked—alcohol felt like the last thing I had to get over. I thought:"Why am I dancing with it? It killed my mother and it doesn't make me feel good." If I'm really honest, the only reason I did drink was because it's so prevalent in society and I didn't want to feel outside the group. My identity was centered around being the fun person who went out and drank and didn't want to stop being that person.
Many people I know think you're either an alcoholic or you're not; that it's almost pre-determined and so they could never be that person. But I don't think like that. I believe anyone has the propensity to become an alcoholic, within the right circumstance, with the right ignorance. It's a relief to know that's never going to be something I need to worry about.
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