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Dear Pay Dirt: We also own three homes.
What comes to mind is the possibility that he absorbs the full cost of the rent—he is capable of doing this as he just got a good job and makes three times what I make. He was going to make the move even before we thought of marriage, he was planning to do this for his daughter anyway, and he would have gotten the same size apartment we are in now .
This arrangement would help me to pay for gas and save money that would allow me to pay for self-care services. Do you think I’m asking for too much? Do I sound out of line? How can I negotiate with my husband?I would be resentful, too, if I had a $300 expense in my budget that wasn’t there before, along with a new two-hour commute. Since your husband makes three times the amount of money you do, ask if you can. This is a common way for couples to split living costs, especially when there’s a drastic difference in your paychecks. Be honest with him about why you think this is a fair arrangement, based on your income and new expenses because of the move, along with needing more money for self-care. He’ll most likely agree, and if not, you can remind him that while you did agree to the move, you did not realize that your income would not keep up with the additional expenses of living there, and you would like some additional support to help you be your best self. If he suggests you change your job, then we have different issues to think about.I’m a single New York City renter in a high-cost-of-living neighborhood; my rent just increased by 27 percent and my landlord was not willing to negotiate that amount. For a variety of reasons, I’ve decided to re-sign this lease for one more year and am able to do so because of a recent promotion at work . This drastic increase has made me think about saving for a down payment to buy instead of renting, but I’m not sure if that’s even a reasonable or realistic goal for me.My overall financial health is good: sufficient emergency fund, maxing out my workplace retirement contributions and my Roth IRA annually, student loans are fully paid off, and I carry no other debt besides a credit card balance that I pay in full each month. I also put a small amount of money into an ETF each month—an amount I’d been planning on increasing before I started thinking about saving for a down payment. I’m also very fortunate to have about $20,000 promised by my parents as a gift for a down payment or similar significant life expenses.I feel like I’ve done a pretty good job with financial planning, but I don’t even know how to start thinking about saving to buy a place; or even if that’s something that makes sense for me. Buying in my current, beloved neighborhood would probably be a stretch, but something I could save up for in time. Is this a worthwhile use of my savings planning? Should I be thinking about other ways to put my money to work that can benefit this goal in the future with or without a spouse to also contribute?Buying a piece of real estate in your dream neighborhood is a great way to put your money to work to benefit you in the future. While I usually err on the side of caution with telling people to buy a house or not, I think if you buy a house anywhere, it should be somewhere like New York City. I’ve never heard of real estate decreasing there; I’ve only heard of rising costs, especially rent. If you purchase a place, you’ll have a locked-in mortgage payment so that you’ll no longer be subjected to random rent increases of 27 percent.
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