My Baby Isn’t A Baby Anymore

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My Baby Isn’t A Baby Anymore
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Five is hard for us moms, especially for us moms who know we will have no more children.

My baby turned five yesterday. Five years ago, I was begging nurses to get the OB to sign me out and let me go home. Today, he will read little words like “if” and “it,” “cat” and “sat,” “seed” and “need.” Without help, he will assemble a Lego set his grandparents gave him for his birthday. He will babble to me about nifflers and Harry Potter and when is the newmovie, Mama? He will announce loudly that he needs to pee and run to the bathroom. He will not need help.

For mothers, five is the end of an era. It is a stepping away, a stepping aside. Our babies are no longer babies. They move into the wider world. Mine moves into books. Letters begin to make sense, to coalesce into words. He can keep up with his brothers now, run with the packs of children on the playground, no longer sit in my lap with the other babies. I have stored all the baby wraps I love and put up the rest for sale.

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