Miss Manners: ‘We’re happy to donate, but please take us off your social list’

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Miss Manners: ‘We’re happy to donate, but please take us off your social list’
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I have zero interest in attending events held by organizations to which (my partner and I) donate

DEAR MISS MANNERS: My partner and I receive several invitations a year to events held by organizations to which we donate. These events are either one-on-one lunches or cocktail party-type events in recognition of the organization’s accomplishments over the past year. They are also held in recognition of major donors, which we are not.

I have zero interest in attending such events. I intensely dislike dressing up, socializing with people I don’t know , and giving up an entire evening. My partner enjoys it even less. I realize the organizations’ goal is to create a more personal relationship with us, but we are not interested. I have become rather a hausfrau since COVID, and while I get out to some social events, two or three per month is my limit.

You’d think after years of declining, they’d get the hint, but I keep getting personalized emails or phone calls to attend. Can I just admit I dislike dressing up and socializing, and request no such further invitations?Miss Manners would think that saying, “We’re happy to donate, but please take us off your social list” would work, if they are paying attention. Surely it would be a relief to the organization to have fewer people to entertain.

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