Letter writer finds compliments on her makeup to be insulting.
I have had people say to me,"You're pretty" or"You have nice skin." I thank them and forget about it. However, a few times, I have had women say to me,"Your makeup is so pretty," or"Wow, you really know how to apply makeup well."I think I am attractive without makeup on, but I like the more polished look it gives me. Complimenting a woman’s cosmetics is akin to saying, “You’re probably only attractive because you’re wearing makeup.
Therefore, those admittedly awkward compliments are not about your beauty, but about your artistry. You are not obliged to give a cosmetics tutorial, but Miss Manners does not believe that you have been insulted.I am an employee of a state government. There are times when we employees are asked to donate cash towards a gift for a co-worker . I don’t mind donating on these occasions. What I am questioning is the manner in which gifts are solicited.
Miss Manners would strongly suggest asking why these records are being kept and, if necessary, saying that you will contribute privately.Meghan Leahy: Can I give my older child a special day without my younger child?
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