Miss Manners: I was horrified when the fruit pickers invaded my yard

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Miss Manners: I was horrified when the fruit pickers invaded my yard
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I invited one person and I got a caravan of strangers, including children.

This group nearly stripped the trees. Obviously, I will never invite her again, but is there anything that I could have said to discourage this at the time?As your church acquaintance was smugly aware of her rudeness, the only thing Miss Manners would have done is agreed with her: “Yes, we weren’t expecting such a large crowd and thorough picking of our fruit. It looks like we may not have enough left for the pie I was hoping to make for everyone later.

Announcing my situation in advance can cause a problem for the hosts, who choose to allow it to dictate the menu. Not explaining my problem causes me great embarrassment when confronted with a plate of food I cannot eat. Refusing the invitation without giving an honest reason seems to convey not wanting to get together. Responding that I am unavailable at the date/time suggested often is met with an offer to change the date/time. Suggesting that we meet in a restaurant instead seems rude, since I am controlling and changing their plans.While Miss Manners does not usually condone hijacking invitations, yours is a good reason for an exception.

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