Letter writer wonders how to respond to unknown callers.
I receive a lot of unwanted telephone calls from telemarketers and real estate buyers who are seeking to buy my house. Many of these callers start out by asking for me by name and then inquiring how I am doing. Every once in a while, one of these callers turns out to be a recruiter instead of a telemarketer, so I wish to remain polite in spite of the annoyance of being called repeatedly by the same companies I’ve asked to stop calling.
Even knowing that most people who ask how I am doing aren't actually seeking a truthful or complete answer, I still feel uncomfortable responding to what feels like a personal question from someone with whom I have no personal relationship. I don't feel that comfortable making a reciprocal inquiry into their well-being, either.
Is there a polite way to respond without answering their question? And does etiquette demand that I respond in kind with an inquiry into their well-being?” “relationship” and “personal” have become so corrupted in common use that Miss Manners finds them entirely unhelpful in answering your question.
I want no contact at all with her ever again. Am I out of line? How should I act if she does want to call on me again for a visit?and defamatory accusation against your deceased father was a poor way for your cousin to discover if you would be a sympathetic ear for her own problems — if that was what she was doing — but your reaction made your point. If she did not apologize profusely, she should understand why it will no longer be convenient for you to entertain her.
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