Kids Deal With Toxic Friends Too. Here's What Parents Should Do — And Not Do

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Kids Deal With Toxic Friends Too. Here's What Parents Should Do — And Not Do
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Experts define what makes a child's behavior toxic and suggest several ways that kids can respond.

, a behavior disorder that can make them hostile to anyone they’re interacting with, not just other children.a child who does not know they’re insecure,” said Leonard, “a child who feels profoundly insecure and compensates with narcissism.”“In order to feel secure in the friendship, they have to tear the other kid down,” Leonard explained. “The hallmark of a toxic kid is they are completely unaware and they do not care how their actions and words impact someone else.

1) Ignore the behavior or walk away. It deescalates the conflict when your child refuses to participate in the exchange. If your child is having a hard time understanding that a friend’s behaviors are toxic, Lockhart suggests discussing what makes a good friend. She even recommends bringing out markers and paper or a whiteboard to make a list. You can then reference this, pointing out when someone doesn’t meet the friendship criteria.

Movies and television are another good way to engage kids on the topic of friendship. They may be more open to talking about the interactions of imaginary characters than the people in their own life. That other thing you’re tempted to do, to head straight for the schoolyard? Or perhaps get on the phone immediately with the teacher or the other child’s parent? You should hold back there, too.By intervening and trying to fix the problem, the parent is going to make it worse,” said Leonard.

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