In My 40s, I Give No F*cks And Owe No Explanations “I just want to revel in my 40s and live the way that I want to. I am wearing my red lips everywhere that I go and I will enjoy my '90s rap blaring from my minivan anytime that I want.”
and became a wife and mother, it was more about what my family thought of me, but I was still conscious of the way that I looked. I got ready for work and dressed fashionably, but mostly in all black so that I didn’t have to ever match anything. I colored my hair every shade under the sun and started to come into my own. I was a young mom, with a cool job, and fun style. I wanted people to like me. I cared what people thought when I was in public.
Sometimes my kids don’t like what I cook for dinner. You know what? That’s fine. I wanted it, your dad likes it, and so do some siblings. I have spent 13 years cooking meals to satisfy three people all the way up to our current six. There have been plenty of nights that I have eaten something that I didn’t want because of my children. I adore them, but I also really like chicken breasts breaded in Dot’s Pretzels with a side of peas and some couscous, so I am having it.
I write a lot of essays. I use bad language. I give my opinion. I share intimate details of my life. If you don’t want to read it, fine. Don’t. You’re not hurting my feelings. If you see me as someone you might know on Facebook and your first inclination is, “God, I can’t stand her,” don’t friend me. If you are tired of my posts, hit the unfriend button. I am not going to stop posting funny videos of my mother trying on clothes over her clothes in the middle of TJ Maxx. That’s what we do.
I am not working on being your friend in my 40s. As I said, I have a gaggle of children, and that is my priority. We have practices and dentist appointments and haircuts. I am always busy — I don’t have time to work to be your friend. I have many acquaintances and a few very close friends. I may not text them for months, but when I do, it picks up right where we left off. That is what I want. I don’t need to be guilted into weekly Orange Theory meet ups with coffee afterward.
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