Now that I've seen the 'bralaclava,' everything is different. She’s the only person on this goddamn earth having any fun.
Julia made the pilgrimage back to her birthplace, Milan, Italy, for its fashion week, where she wore the bralaclava with her signature catcoon eye. I gasped when I saw it. It was the most beautiful and impractical item of clothing I’d ever seen, making it the zenith of fashion. You can’t shake your head too vigorously in agreement or disagreement, or you risk exposing yourself. But then again, you’re in Europe and everyone has a much more sophisticated outlook on nipples there.
The bralaclava, the booty window, and Julia’s little pose with her peacocked little hand brought it all together for me. She’s the only person on this goddamn earth having any fun. I can’t believe I didn’t see it before. I wrongly thought she was acting out, dressing insanely for clout. What a small brain I had! But brains and catcoon-winged eyeliner can grow. Maybe if I stopped mainlining Olivia Wilde/Miss Flo drama for one goddamn day I would’ve seen it earlier.
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