She still doesn’t like me. It hurts
‘She is not grateful. Far from it. She finds my presence intrusive,’ writes Stephanie Danler
. But those statements don’t reflect the reality. They elide how difficult, emotional, and plain unpleasant it is to care for her.that nearly killed her. She was in a coma for a month, paralysed when she awoke, and slowly, after many years, regained some abilities. For a moment, we called her a miracle. We hung all our hopes on her. But while certain things temporarily improved, she did not get better.
Make sure she has prescriptions, pay her property taxes, check and pay her credit card statement to make sure she doesn’t plunge intoagain. I pretend I don’t see the bottles of alcohol hidden in her laundry basket because there is nothing I can do to make her stop. She is not grateful. Far from it. She finds my presence intrusive. Though she doesn’t remember it, she intuits that we are not close. Perhaps it comes in flashes to her, how we fell out in my adolescence.
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