“It is hard to imagine that a child in the second grade could answer the question ‘What do police officers do?’ with the word help and have it be true. What do I do with this realism?” writes tylachelleco
Photo: Stephen Maturen/Getty Images Nothing related to the outcome of police killings surprises me anymore. When I read the Louisville mayor had declared a state of emergency ahead of the grand jury’s announcement regarding the police-killing of Breonna Taylor, I knew what that declaration meant. I knew the grand jury’s decision would be one likely to cause unrest, that it would be the complete opposite of “Justice for Breonna.
A little more than an hour later, it was announced that the grand jury had only indicted one officer, and not for her murder, but for wanton endangerment. Of course, I thought. I’d been right. I may not have a concrete answer to this fundamental question. But I do know that outcomes like what happened in this case are part and parcel to my understanding of what a police officer does. A police officer does not pay for his actions. The experience of living in this Black and female body for 40 years has taught me to never be surprised by outcomes like this. I often think of Tressie McMillan Cottom’s essay “Know Your Whites,” from her book Thick.
I don’t want to be resigned. I don’t want to be complacent. I want to believe that my vote matters. I want this country to value me. I want justice. Because despite all the evidence that tells me that this country does not love me, I love it. So, to be resigned means that I am giving up on this relationship, that I am settling for treatment I do not deserve, that I’ll accept the status quo. My heart just cannot allow that, no matter how often it gets broken.
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