MyTwoCents: “I spent $450 on a warehouse sale from this brand I’ve become obsessed with. I buy clothes on Instagram constantly. It’s like now that I have all this extra money, I feel like I’ve become this whole new person I don’t recognize”
For the first time in my life, I’m making a really good salary, and so is my husband. We’ve always been very careful with money. We both maxed out our 401s and IRAs even when we made tiny starting salaries. We have a healthy emergency fund and an investment account that we filled in our 20s. We have no children, a mortgage with a cheap monthly payment, and healthy parents who support themselves.
I understand why you miss your old life. It feels good to live simply and to work toward larger financial goals. The problem, it seems, is that you never really envisioned the life you’d lead once you actually accomplished those goals and had money to spare. Now that your discipline has paid off — you’ve not only attained financial stability, but actual wealth — you don’t know what to do with it.
Right now, it seems like you’ve been following a sort of rich-person life template that’s readily available on Instagram and social media. It’s a seductive world of handwoven throw pillows and tasteful ceramics, and it’s also a bottomless money pit. Still, it doesn’t seem like you’ve gone off the rails. I get the feeling that you see yourself as someone spraying hundred-dollar bills out of a grenade launcher, but let’s look at reality.
I suggest an exercise that financial adviser Manisha Thakor got me to try a few years ago: Write down everything you spend your money on, every day, for a couple of weeks . Then look at your list and highlight the things that felt worthwhile and satisfying.
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