'Black mothers in America have always known what it is like to carry a life that the world has already decided will not matter.'
’s grotesque murders is still so fresh, it feels unjust to have to process yet another loss so soon.
My nursing assistant mother and cab driver/security guard/perennial-entrepreneur father, like so many of my neighbors, worked their ways into the suburbs to give their children that elusive gift of “a better life.” This leap was particularly large for my father, who was born in a Yoruba village in southern Nigeria, the second youngest of 12 children, with no memory of his own father who died of a heart attack when he was only 4 years old.
For my part, I opted for the escape of success, dedicating myself to becoming president of as many clubs and teams and achieving as many A+s as humanly possible. My brother followed the other path of escape, seeking as much attention as trouble could bring him. Only later as an adult, after readingabout systemic racism in Bloomington public schools, did I think about how we both suffered the insidious harm of Minnesota’s “polite” racism in our own ways.
After graduating high school, I found my fastest way out of the Twin Cities ― a full ride to Grinnell College, running from a difficult childhood and seeking that “better” we are all after. My first student trip brought me to the South for the first time, a volunteer trip to a hurricane-ravaged New Orleans.
By my second year of college, I knew I’d move to the South when I graduated.
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