'Stress and anxiety manifested itself in picking at my skin, because I felt like I was doing something “productive” and craving that satisfaction of success (read: a “successful pop”).' alyssainthecity on her compulsive skin picking for ItsMental:
It’s Mental is a series aiming to open up the conversation around mental health and fashion — from what it’s really like to work in the industry to how clothing can be used as a means to cope and uplift. In this essay, writer and influenceropens up about her anxiety, the pressure of always having to look perfect, and her compulsive skin picking as a result.
For as long as I can remember, I’ve dealt with compulsive skin picking. Not the skin on my fingers, nor the little bumps on the back of my arms — but on my face. I’ll contort my body to get my face as close to the mirror as possible, and use the pads of my fingertips to scan for every bit or bump of skin that needs attention, whether it’s a flake of skin, a juicy whitehead, or a hard-to-reach blackhead.
When I was in high school my mom would notice a fresh wound and tell me to just let my zits heal on their own. I thought I was just going through the hormonal acne that most teens do. That was the case, but I’d also started a habit I’d be dealing with for the rest of my life. At least back then, in my eyes, I had an excuse because I had actual zits to pop.
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